So today something happened… Something that is bound to make me bitter. I am still blind sided and dumbfounded. I have been made to feel like I can just be pushed aside. After having a pleasant conversation with a friend and revealing a bit of information that I belive (as well as a few other friends) was a sane, perfectly acceptable thing to say. And it BLEW up in my face. I am not sure why… Timing is what I think the issue was. I could be wrong, but I am doing my best to just accept it. People have faults but I just cannot fathom what I said or did. So now I bring it back to well I tried and it didn’t work. Maybe a major change is in order… 

Recently I have been contemplating a BIG change! Moving… I was wanting to go to NJ because I’m from there I have “family” there, but I am thinking I need to be farther to really make this happen. So maybe Kansas, I have real family out there. Questions will be asked and I can try to figure it out. I know making a drastic change can be scary but life here is scary for me right now too! 

I thought I was doing well, things were falling into place. I have accomplished things and then I get pushed WAY back. Reality sucks and I want to live in my own world! I don’t know where I am going but I do know here and now I need more support. So NJ or KS?, who knows but I do need more support. 


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